What does the brain have to do with sex? According to page one of Dr. Daniel G. Amen’s book, The Brain in Love (Three Rivers Press, 2007), “The brain is the largest sex organ (and size matters!)”
No reader will doubt Dr. Amen’s highly credible explanation, that continues throughout the book. Amen, a psychiatrist and brain imaging expert, explains how love affects the body and brain, and how the body and brain affect the behaviors of men and women in love.
The Brain in Love is relevant to those who want to enhance their love lives, or better understand themselves or their partners.
Gender Differences in Men and Women’s Brains, and Types of Lovers
Dr. Amen describes several different types of relationship partners based on how different brains work. He offers suggestions on how to get along with each type. He explains the differences that are hard-wired in men’s and women’s brains, and gives advice to each in getting along with the other.
He describes the chemistry of love – exactly what goes on in the body, how men and women effect each other on a visceral level, why people commit to each other, and the difference between love and infatuation.
Dr. Daniel G. Amen Offers Tips for Surviving Break-Ups
Those who are in the midst of a break-up would benefit from The Brain in Love. When Dr. Amen explains what goes on in the body biochemically after a break-up, it helps readers understand that these feelings are temporary and that they will pass.
He also offers tips on how to ease the symptoms resulting from a break-up. His advice is grounded firmly in brain science and his own, personal experience. He even scanned his own brain during a break-up to see what the brain in grief looks like. This is truly a man who is passionate about his work!
The Brain in Love and Unusual Sex
Everything people always wanted to know about unusual sex but were afraid to ask is covered in this book. Daniel Amen explains the common paraphilias (sexual deviations) and fetishes, where they come from, what parts of the brain are involved.
Anyone who has ever had thoughts they considered odd will be interested in his discussion of odd thoughts, and whether or not they are "normal."
Aphrodisiacs and Sexy Food in The Brain In Love
There is a chapter on aphrodisiacs based on purely scientific research, as well as sexy foods, (chocolate and artichokes are on the list,) and answers to any questions about the G spot (complete with a diagram.)
Dr. Amen offers a brain system questionnaire for those who can’t afford to get a brain scan. It can help determine whether brain problems might be present in certain parts of the brain, and what to do about them.
Dr. Amen’s Dating and Relationship Advice
Those who tend to get swept up into relationships without discernment will benefit from Dr. Amen’s sound advice about what should or could be considered a red flag.
Daniel Amen talks about different personality, anxiety and mood disorders and how they can get in the way of relationships. He discusses other problems like, sexual addictions (yes, he does believe that sex can be an addiction), and offers advice on treating disorders and anything else that can interfere with love and relationships.
The Down Side of The Brain in Love
If there is one drawback to this book it is that it hooks people into wanting to have their brains scanned, and obviously very few people will actually have the opportunity to do that. Dr. Amen gives such a wonderful holistic view of the person through the mind-body lens, it feels like a let down that people aren’t privy to seeing their own brains.
The questionnaire that attempts to make up for this may be too general and brief to really be helpful. Though the book is engaging, entertaining and educational, it would be useful if more tools were made available with the book.
The book is The Brain in Love: 12 Lessons to Enhance Your Love Life, by Dr. Daniel G. Amen. New York: Three Rivers Press, 2007. ISBN: 978-0-307-58789-3. This book was formerly titled, Sex on the Brain.
Lisa C. DeLuca - Lisa C. DeLuca is a psychotherapist/social worker who works with families and teens. She also treats panic and anxiety disorders.
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